I love your site. I’m a Nana to two beautiful grandaughters who are 18 months old. They are African American and have very thick curly hair that is frizzy in the back and hate to get their hair combed. My daughter has tried African American products, but they don’t seem to moisturize and they leave their hair full of heavy product. They hate getting their hair combed. What products would you suggest for their hair to detangle, moisturize and keep healthy?

First of all, thank you so much! I cannot tell you how happy it makes me to know that people like my site; it’s a labor of love.

Congratulations to you and your daughter on your grand-daughters. I assume they are twins…whew, you have your hands full!

With that said, I have to break some bad news to you. Most children do not like their hair combed. My nieces didn’t like it; my cousin has 3 children and I remember, like it was yesterday, how she had to fight with them to keep their hair combed and untangled. Ok, twist my arm. My mother complained about my not wanting to sit still to have my hair combed too. There! I said it…lol.

Anyway, keeping curly, coarse hair moisturized is always challenging.

I will recommend what my mother did with us:

1. 1. She always detangled as best she could before she shampooed our hair.
2. 2. She would shampoo our hair.
3. 3. Apply a cheapie creme rinse to help the comb slide through in the shower, or while it was wet.
4. 4. Rinse and apply a really good leave-in conditioner.

One thing we never, ever used in my house is hair grease. I know a lot of black, African American friends of mine, prefer grease to combat dry scalps, and to keep hair moisturized, but I think that grease is actually counter-productive.

Grease attracts dirt and tends to clog the pores. So, if you apply hair grease (not sure if you do or not), then that’s going to not only be messy on the sheets, but it’s going to prevent any natural oils from falling.

I recommend doing a little spot test with Nexxus Humectress, as a leave in, or Sebastian Potion No. 9. I would apply either, or even a combo of both to damp hair (will work on dry hair too, but wet hair is more agreeable). The reason for the spot test is that most hair products contain a lot of perfumes and sometimes children’s skin show bad reactions to these additives.

If there’s not adverse reaction, then apply to the entire head, then put big, chunky braids, if there’s enough length. My mother rarely let us wear our hair loose, because she didn’t want to hear us crying when it was time to comb it, especially my youngest sister. Whew! That girl would cry, cry, cry. I think she was about 14 before she let anyone actually comb her hair without screaming.

Children’s hair is typically more delicate than ours. I am not sure when the hair changes, but there is usually a difference between the peach-fuzz we’re born with and our permanent hair texture. Regardless, you want to be gentle. In fact, we can learn a lot about detangling our own hair, by working on a baby. I always tell people to comb their own hair, just as they would comb the hair of an infant.

When looking for products, look for things that give sheen, like finishing products: Razac Perfect for Perms and any type of serum. Serums, although thicker than spray on sheens, they are lighter than hair grease and ten to wash out much better. They also don’t weigh the hair down as much.

The trick is going to be finding the right amount; that may require a bit of trial-n-error, but after a few tries, you should have a good understanding of just how much to use.

One thing that may be contributing to the adding to the difficulty is the shampoo itself. Sometimes, shampoos can be harsh and although, they leave the scalp clean, they leave the hair begging for moisture. Aveeno makes a pretty good baby shampoo that won’t leave the hair too dry. And since their hair is dry, I would caution against shampooing too frequently. If your daughter is washing their hair daily, I suggest she try every other day, or every limit it to twice a week.

If my memory serves me well, I think my sister only washed my niece’s hair once a week; she has kinky hair, but it never looked dry or brittle, because my sister didn’t over shampoo and used some of the products I mentioned.

Hope that helps,

LaNegra